Pictures!

HI FAM!

Took some pictures this weekend that i wanted to share with yall!

Jimmy's Birthday:

trick MAFIA game of "keep jimmy alive!"

SURPRISE!!

TWO CAKES FOR B-DAY BOY!

FIVE GUYS employee card :)

brotherly loovvee :)

Sunday Lunch @ New Dehli:

on the yellow cheese bus to church!

The Brothers!

The Sisters!

YUM YUM YUM :D

thaaaats all folks! :)

Power of Prayer

Dear Brothers & Sisters,

How are you all? I'm sad that the blog has not been updated in weeks! Have you all forgot about it? :( I'm also sad that I have not seen many of you recently.. it's been such a long time.. Plus we only have 5 or 6 more small groups till the end of this year.. :(

Maybe it's the rain, but im feeling kind of lifeless and exhausted today. What an ugly start to a week after the beautiful weekend that we just had! But if it weren't for these rainy days, we wouldn't be able to appreciate the sunny ones as much as we did right? :)

I just wanted to quickly update the blog and say THANK YOU to all of you that prayed for my family. Our family is doing MUCH better already and there is no doubt in my mind that it is through the power of PRAYER.

His answer to our prayers may not always be YES but sometimes it is no, or wait. When its not that immediate YES, we feel discouraged and afraid that maybe He is not listening. But Brothers & Sisters, He IS! and He will give you accordingly in His time what is BEST for you.

Be encouraged my family! Our God is ALIVE and WORKING for our GOOD. So NEVER lose sight of him, ALWAYS pray, and praise Him with every breath you take!!

I miss you all and hope to see you soon!

My name is Sharon Suk and through the thick & thin, Jesus Fulfills MY LIFE !

Prayers Please :)

Dear Family,

I'm hurting a lot. I cannot go into detail of exactly what I'm going through but it is about my parents back home in jersey. It's been this way ever since I could remember, but for them it's been 25 years now. I have been praying since I knew how to pray but God has not yet lifted it from our shoulders. God says that through suffering he builds character and brings us closer to Him and I do believe it to be true. However over 20 years of it makes it hard to remain faithful. Especially when you are sick spiritually and physically. I'm sorry for being vague but I still ask for your prayers for my family. That we will remain faithful to God and keep that heart to be able to BELIEVE that this suffering is for our good.

I'm so thankful I have you all in my life. God truly reminds me through you, that I have family of sisters and brothers I can rely on. Whether you know it or not, he has used each one of you to comfort me and bring smiles in the toughest times. Thank you for your love and prayers. If I don't get to see you before spring break, I hope you all have a great break! & try to update during the break since you'll have more time than you would during school!

I'll miss you all very much :)

Although I cannot comprehend this pain, because I believe that God loves me, I can confidently say that My name is Sharon Suk and Jesus Fulfills my life.

ps: read richards story below me! it's awesome :)

THE GOD-SIZED HOLE

okay. here's a little story by Donny Cho that he shared with us in a little book...
this story is called "THE GOD-SIZED HOLE"

There once lived a people-a people not-so-different from you and me, in a town not-so-different from yours, in a country, not-so-different from the one you and I live in. There were all sorts of people in this town: there were big people and small people, beautiful people and ugly people, people with big hands and people with small hands, people with long hair and people with short hair, smart people and not-so-smart people, rich people and poor people, loud people and quiet people, and, well, you get the point.

In this town, lived a boy-a boy not-so-different from other people like yourself, except for one thing-this boy had a SUPER-HUGE, GIANT, ENORMOUS, GREAT, BIG HOLE right in the middle of his heart, and it hurt to even look at it (you can only imagine). Sometimes, the boy tried to cover it up. When he dressed, he wore thick clothing to protect this super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole in his heart, but that never worked. The clothing would just get swallowed up by this super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole (weird). He would try to buy the nicest clothes he could find-"Maybe that would work," he would tell himself. Although the finest of clothing would work for a while, and although other people would praise him for his style and fashion, eventually, just as he suspected, the clothes would only make the super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole seem wider.
After all, we're not just talking about a speck, here. We're talking about a super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of his heart; no matter what he tried to do to cover it up, it was always there-and it showed. And it hurt-even to look at it.

He decided to study harder-to understand how to get rid of the hole. The boy studied, and studied, and studied, and studied. Eventually, he was accepted into the greatest of colleges, and he become one of the smartest people the world ever knew. But, the more he studied this super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of his heart, he realized he would never be able to get to the bottom of it; the hole was too deep and too vast for him to fully understand. Although it felt good to be a smart person, it never helped him to get rid of the super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole in his heart.
After all, we're not just talking about some ordinary hole, here. We're talking about a super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole-right in the middle of his heart; no matter what he tried to do to figure it out, all the knowledge in the world wasn't enough to solve his problem.

And so, he did what he should've done in the first place. He sought a doctor. "The job of the doctor is to help solve problems like this," the boy though to himself. The thought gave him a lot of hope. And so, the boy went to one of the best doctors in the whole world, in one of the best hospitals in the whole world. The doctor examined this super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of his heart. He examined him for hours, and hours, and hours, and hours.But, the doctor was puzzled. "I don't unzuh-stanz it," he said (the doctor was from another country- a really smart country). "You have a big problem, here, but i cannot zolvez it. Ze hole is zo big!" The boy was disappointed. He muttered, "I could've told you that myself. A few days later, the boy received a super-huge, giant, enormous, great, big medical bill.

What was he to do? He spent his days, and his nights, looking for an answer. Some people told him to fill the hole up with gold coins. So, the boy worked feverishly to make lots and lots of money-after all, he was one of the smartest people in the whole (no pun intended) world. But, it didn't work. The coins weighed him down, and also gave him heartburn. And although he could buy nice cars, and big houses, and go anywhere he wanted, those things only distracted him for a little while; every night when he would go to sleep, he would hear his heart beating, and the empty beat would remind him of the super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole in his heart.

Some people told him to get married. "Having a wife will help you forget about your little problem," the old men of his town would say. So, the boy made some friends-after all, he had tons of money, and was the smartest, nicest-dressed, healthiest person he knew, and those things always distracted other people from seeing his super-huge, giant, enormous problem. He eventually fell in love-it felt really good to be in love. "Maybe this is it," he exclaimed. "She is the answer!" But, as time went by, the boy grew discouraged. The closer he grew to his girlfriend, he began to see that she also had a super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of her heart! He would look at her heart, and poke fun at it, and she would look at his, and ridicule him. Both of them realized that being together didn't make the super-huge-giant, enormous, great big holes in their hearts go away; the holes only grew larger. Oh, the despair! They both broke down and cried.


The boy was helpless. He started to reason with himself. "There is nothing we can do. No clothing can cover us. No intelligence can save us. No doctor can heal us. No amount of money can purchase a solution. No relationship can help us forget. There is nowhere we can hide, and nowhere we can go to fill this super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of our hearts."

Just then, a man approached the boy, who was wallowing in despair. "What's the matter?" "It's no use trying to cover it up-look, I have a super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of my heart, and I am helpless to find something that will fill it completely, and I tried everything. It's disgusting, and scary, and empty, and painful. I don't know what to do, so I figured I would just cry for a while (sniff-sniff)."
The man looked at the super-huge-giant, enormous, great big problem, but didn't frown, nor wince, nor turn away in disgust. "There is a name for your condition," he diagnosed. "You mean, you've seen this before?" asked the boy, with curiosity rushing the blood back into his pale white face. "Seen it before? Look around-" The boy turned to survey the town, and then he saw it-everyone-big people and small people, beautiful people and ugly people, people with big hands and people with small hands, people with long hair and people with short hair, smart people and not-so-smart people, rich people and poor people, loud people and quiet people, and well, you get the point-everyone had the same super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole right in the middle of their hearts, and they were doing everything they could to fill it.

They tried to fill their hearts with all sorts of things:
Some people ate, some people dieted.
Some people sang loudly,
while others sat quieted.
Some folks were king, while others were rude.
Some acted rough, while others were smooth.
Some went to church-and did what was right.
Some folks cared less-to their delight.
No matter their manner-they all had one goal,
To hopelessly fill their super-huge, giant,
enormous hole, great, big hole-
right in the middle of their hearts.

The man had a name for the boy's situation. "It's a super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole, and it was created by sin. And it can never be filled, because it's a GOD-sized you've been searching all your life to fill it with all sorts, of things, but all those things put together will never be able to fill this hole in your heart. In fact, as big as that hole appears, it's even bigger than that0it's so big that you can't see the end of it. It's a God-sized hole, and only God Himself can fill it."
"Then, I am doomed, because God would never care for a pea-sized boy like me," The boy confessed. But, the man assured, "You are not doomed. In fact, God made a way for people like you-people like me-to be filled." As he began to share his story, the boy noticed that this man didn't have a hole in his heart-his heart was completely, totally, utterly whole (what a difference a "w" makes)! The man told the true story of Jesus, God's own Son, who was born with a perfect heart. Jesus was the only Person ever born who didn't have a hole in his heart (because He was sinless and perfect in every way). But, He came with a purpose. On the cross, Jesus became sin (2 Corinthians 5:21) for us. In other words, on the cross, Jesus took the God-sized hole in our hearts (punctured by our sin)...so that He could give us His own heart. And God sent Jesus out of His deep love, even for pea-sized people like us.

The boy, upon hearing these words, softened to the voice of the man. The words gave him hope, and took away his fear. The finest clothes could never give him the covering that a complete heart could. No amount of knowledge was able to accomplish what one word of wisdom from the man was able to do. The best of doctors could not give him the heart transplant he needed. The world's riches couldn't purchase what was offered to him for free. The deepest relationship could never fill the void that is left when one didn't know Jesus. Beyond the size of the hole in his heart, the boy was overwhelming with joy that a God that is even bigger than the God-sized crater left in the boy's heart could still love him so. He just wanted to know Jesus-the perfect heart that was traded in for his sinful, empty one. The boy exclaimed, "I want to know more about Jesus, sir." "I will introduce Him to you; you can meet Him yourself," replied the man. The boy sprung up, and trotted off with the man-and as he walked away, what was once a "God-sized hole" already began to close.

So, the next time you feel empty, or when you mess up real bad, or when you make your parents sad, or when you try to hide away from people because you did something you were ashamed of-or when you feel jealous because people have nicer clothes, or more money than you-or when you feel lonely because you have trouble making friends-don't look to a doctor-after all, it's because your sin has left a "God-sized hole" inside your heart, too. But, God is calling you. Look to someone you love who might be able to tell you more about Jesus-as you come to know Him, you'll come to trust in the super-huge-giant, enormous, great, big thing that Jesus did for you, so that you can be found in Him, as He lives in you.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This story is something that I look back upon from time to time, I am looking at it right now and wrote it to you also because even though I forget this sometimes, I know that there is always a super-huge-giant, enormous, great big hole that is being mended. And whenever I begin to feel that emptiness or loneliness, it feels as if the hole that is being tended to is being ripped wide open again. I keep straying from God and feeling lonely because I KEEP putting things right in my heart instead of God and as a result, my heart just sucks it up and the emptiness returns. I can never be able to love God if something else is tugging at my heart causing me to take a wrong turn or making me lose sight of Him...

But. However. Yet. On the other hand.

God's love never fails. His love for us has overcome our selfishness. our shallowness. our loneliness.

God.
Redeems.
Everything.

There is no questioning or arguing this and no way to ever change this. He puts our sin as far as the east is to the west and remembers it no more. our everlasting, gracious, merciful, loving, unfailing, and perfect God has saved us from the most deadliest thing of all. ourselves. Although we may fail in EVERY SINGLE aspect of our lives, He redeems us. Although we put other things at the center of our hearts. He redeems it. Although we may not love God, He redeems us because He knows that we are broken and helpless and, though we want to give Him all of ourselves, we are unable to. We are unable to truly love God. BUT. God redeems us through His perfect Son and our greatest treasure of grace and mercy.

This is Richard O and, I am so glad that I can say this even with a broken heart, Jesus fulfills my life

God is good ALL THE TIME!

Fatty fat fat :)

so.. i just went to the gym for the Zumba (latin dance) class. this is my 3rd time going but i still haven't got to take the class cause classes were cancelled the first two times . i actually learned my lesson and called them in advance to make sure they had class today. they did! so i was SUPER excited.

so i walk to the door and the dude stops me and says that the class is FULL. that i need to come an hour in advance to reserve a spot. so for the 3rd time in a row, i could NOT take my Zumba classses!!!

I was too angry to go on the treadmill or elliptical, so i walked to 711 and got me a Haagendaz Vanilla Almond bar.

I must say, i'm still pretty mad about it, but this ice cream sure is yummy :)

why am i sharing this with you? mmmm cause you care :) hehe AND it reminded me that Jesus never cancels on us, is always available, and I don't need to reserve a spot to talk to Him. He's THE BEST :)

My name is Sharon Suk, and Jesus Fulfills My LIfe!!!

JFML

i. am. shallow. i. am. selfish.

this week or so i've been kind of struggling with my identity and my central focus in life. there were so many times when i was thinking about why am i like this, why do i feel a certain way about a certain issue, and why do i do the things i do. no matter where my train of thought was, it always led me to two points that i hate in other people and realized that they're within me.

i. am. shallow. i. am. selfish.

whenever i think about why i do things now, i always come to the same conclusion which is that in everything i do, i do it for myself and i do it for my own image so that ultimately it will make myself look better in other people's eyes. maybe so that they will like me, love me, or just give me those small words of praise. i don't know. when i come to think about my life, all i can think about is the emptiness that has continuously filled every single aspect. even when i went to retreats where i felt like i had met God, i now question whether or not i even really love Him. this concept of love is so daunting to me because if i don't love God, what is this life that i am living? if i truly loved God, wouldn't i put Him above all else without question? i have all this knowledge of what i'm supposed to, knowledge of how and why i am supposed to approach it, yet when it really comes down to it, i know DEEP within my heart that i don't really love Him. how can i even approach any other problems within my life if i don't resolve within myself if i actually love God down to the core of my being? i'm starting to realize that, within my last post, that when people approach me with questions and stuff like that, i enjoy being approached in that way because i know that they view me as a somewhat trustworthy person, probably a "Godly" person, and a pretty good person.
ALL OF THIS MEANS NOTHING AND IS ENTIRELY, UTTERLY MEANINGLESS IF GOD IS NOT THE CENTER OF ALL OF THIS.
how can i even think about anything else?
how can i even think about leading other people?
how can i even think about life without God?

there is a single fear in the depths of my heart which is the answer to the question that i now keep asking myself, do i love, adore, seek God? if i'm really honest with myself, i would have to say no. what i do keep finding myself answering in response is that i really love attention from the ones that i want attention from. this is how i am both selfish and shallow. and to be quite honest, when it came to crushes back in the day and maybe even to this day, i find myself "liking" the girls that were pretty which obviously shows my shallowness. when i remember about this fault in myself, the continuous question is "what the HELL am i living for?"

why can't i just be satisfied in the one who has saved me from myself?

the only reason people seem to find me good is because of my actions on the outer surface, but i can see the depths of my own self and the true reasons behind it all. at times in the back of my mind, i just want to be like a child and scream, curse, and throw a temper tantrum like i used to. i think if i'm really honest with myself, i am still that same child i used to be but just more outwardly "good." i know that i am childish in the way i act, but that's because i haven't grown up at all. i look at myself and i know that within myself the only thing that has really changed is the outside. am i just another churched korean kid? am i only doing the things i do because i simply just grew up this way? why can't i just take that next to responsibility since there is such a need for leaders? when i look at myself, i can only answer that i am just another churched child, i am only like this because it's engraved into my conscience, and i can't take the next step because i am still TRULY just a child. at times i think and feel like i've grown up, but i know the real is answer is that i am immature, spoiled, indifferent, shallow, selfish, and INSIGNIFICANT. I AM NOTHING. when i think about those movies where the people wish they were never born, i can't help wondering about that myself. do i really make a true difference? some may argue for me, but i have to argue against myself in that the world would still turn and things would be fine if i was never born. i believe this is so because i have rooted myself in my self-righteousness, in acts rather than true surrender, and simply myself.

i am also a deep judgmental person down to the core. i may say that i won't judge or that i don't care but i judge unconsciously every single person surrounding me. i can't even help it, it has become part of me. i am a terrible person. and all of this is because
I DO NOT LOVE GOD.
the bible says that if we don't love our brothers, then we do not love God. also, when i was getting into a discussion about predestination, Daegyu says that certain people are chosen by grace to be sons and daughters of Christ. what if i'm just fooling myself into thinking that i'm a Christian? there is an overwhelming amount of evidence SHOUTING at me in the direction to that of a non-believer. if looking at just my heart, how am i any different from a non-Christian? is Christ shown through me? what does it mean to love God? why do i praise? why do i go to church? why do i try to even begin to understand other people or begin to try to give advice to other people about the faith when i don't even have a the slightest of trust in the Lord? without God, i am nothing. i am worthless. i am just another dead tree waiting to be thrown into the pits of hell.

furthermore, how do we even know if we are being called by God or that we are His children if one can fool themselves? since i do not believe to the core that i love God, does this mean i'm not a Christian? according to the bible, we have to accept Christ as our saviour, but this brings into question genuine true acceptance and all that. how can i think of serving within RCF when i can't even serve God with a true and humble heart that fears him and reveres him and adores his works? leading praise? how can i think about any of that stuff... even while writing this, this could just be another act to get attention like a simple child. do i choose not to go to parties, getting drunk, or doing drugs because God is at the center of my life or because i just don't "fit" with those kind of people? do i think that i'm better than those who do those things? does going to church, going to small group, leading praise make me a better person than them or does it make me even worst because i'm just fooling my own self into thinking that i actually am better than them as a hypocrite? and even just a few hours ago, i posted onto my fb status "even if i turn away you're calling my name. even if i run away in you i shall remain. JFML - Jesus fulfills my life" which is the song that i wrote for our community group. am i just singing lies? am i living a lie? i don't even know if i am. i just..don't know. when i talk about leading praise or seminary is it because God is calling me or is it because i simply don't know what else to do? i'm starting to have so many doubts about myself and just the core of myself. in reflection of all of this blabbering, i can even say the words that i know would come in the following. i would probably say something to myself like "God's love is unfailing and everlasting and that even if we are imperfect in love for him, we can be sure that we are saved through God's unending love for his children. God's love never fails. Christianity isn't about our works but rather about Jesus' sacrifice for us. when we realize that and come to follow Christ, we can't help but sing him praises, spread the gospel, and bear good fruit." but what if i'm simply not a child of God? what if God didn't choose me to join him in everlasting peace and wholeness? since i know in my heart that i do not love God this doesn't necessarily mean that i'm not one of his chosen, but there's a good chance that i'm not. nothing incredibly remarkable within my life has been a moment where i would say "wow, God is real and he loves me." i have not had a particularly special or eventful life and as a result there are so many times when i look back and just feel empty. like for those who have crazy testimonies of how God has called them to his kingdom, i sort of sit there trying to think of how i changed by receiving God as my Lord and Saviour but can't really think of anything. it was like i was a "born and raised" good little Christian boy destined for mediocrity. when i can't think of anything that God is calling me towards, does that mean/could that mean that he's not calling me at all?

and i know that i'm supposed to close by describing how Jesus fulfills my life through the "event/story," but i can't seem to apply that in this situation. i could probably say some shallow things thinking about what i think God could be doing in this situation, but my vision is being so clouded with questions about myself.

-richard o

SNOW DAY=CATCH UP DAY

HELLO 8D
WOOO HOOOOOO!!! NO CLASSES WEDNESDAY & one CLASS THURSDAY unless CLASSES ARE cancelled again!!!!

OH how I longed for a snow day to happen at temple. It is finally here!! We have a snow day Wednesday!! WOO HOO, but yet at the same time sucky... I will have to use it for a study day. This whole week I have been stressed out with classes and how I am behind in my Chemistry class due to the fact that I was lazy and I bought my book late. Oh the frustration. And on top of that I lost my monthly train pass on FRIDAY. I was so pissed. I left it on my clipboard and I had dropped my clipboard. I pick my clipboard up and it is gone. So I frantically look for it everywhere and I have yet to find it. I arrive at Temple, I had to get off since I had class. It was horrible I spent $142.50 on it yet I didn't even use it for a week and I lost it. I feel like it got stolen, when I did realize it was not on my clipboard I looked under and over and I am sure the person next to me thought I was crazy. But hahah I called Septa to see if they could find it, and it happens THAT THEY DIDN'T oh boy. I tell my mom and she goes nice one Jenny, way to be clutsy you, but shes like don't sweat it. Haha my mother is awesome. She always gives such wonderful advice on evil girls. Yes boys I said girls are evil. If you don't really know, you need to know that girls & I have a history. Loads of girls hate me yet don't know me, but its all whatever now. Before I use to care now I could care less. My mother is so wise, she tells me not to worry about the mere girls hating me. She reminded me that my life ever since I was basically born I had girls dislike me. People really are so judgemental all the time its getting sad. That saying is so true to not judge a book by its cover, but we do it all the time. I always wondered why everyone in the world was so quick to judge everyone else, yet are so lazy in getting to know that person... It is interesting. But anywhooo....

Last Thursday we talked about our commitments. And as I tried to figure out exactly what my idol was and is.. PERFECTION. I have this problem where if I do not get like an A I basically beat myself up about it. Or if I know I cannot get an A on it, I don't even make an attempt. There are so many things that it seems like I am committed to other than God. Last weeks small group or community group was an eye opener. I realized how sinful I really was, how this idea of PERFECTION does not fit me at all. The only person that is perfect is Jesus. it is so true how it seems as if I live my life for myself rather than God. Instead this whole commitment to perfection really keeps me from being myself to the fullest potential.

I got my palms read last Thursday just for giggles. It was interesting how this lady that seemed so cold and bitter was able to point things out to me. I mean it probably was not the right thing to do to get my palms read, but I just did it for pure enjoyment. As I shared on Thursday, the palm reader seemed overall correct. She pointed out that I am not doing well in school, which is true. This semester is kicking my butt forsure. I am so lazy and behind right now. Then this palm reader said that I have a problem with believing myself. She stated that I am an intelligent girl that has potential yet I lack faith in myself. She was right in that aspect too. I do have a problem with always second guessing myself, even though when I do second guess and stick with that second guess I am always wrong. If I just left things the way they were without second guessing myself I would be right. Throughout my life, I realized that we do need to believe in ourselves and believe in God. This whole believing thing in God, is a big factor. I think the fact that I am lacking trust in him, is also why I am lacking trust in myself. Trust is an important part I feel like in any relationship. This idea of trust is also not my friend either since I have been hurt so many times. But not to go on another tangent, I feel like God is working in me even though I lack so many qualities. He opens up my eyes to see so many things I have not seen before. My home pastor always says that once you become a Christian, your eyes will become open to see things that you have not seen before. This whole eye opening thing has been happening so often. It is really scary how sinful we all are.

I HOPE EVERYONE HAS A FABULOUS WEEK & WEEKEND... If I do not see you!

This is JENNYI & JESUS FULFILLS MY LIFE!